Aliens Stole My Handbag!

Shock! Horror!
Aliens rampage through Ramsgate!

Dunkstable Police today revealed another incident in the recent spate of handbag thefts. Mrs Penelope Withinthorp was said to be standing in line in Dunkstable Post Office when her handbag was removed. Police refused to comment on eye-witness reports that the handbag had been carried off by a 3-foot tall grey alien with bulbous eyes, but were said to be following a definite line of enquiry. A spokesman from the post office declined to comment.

As the fourth case in the last week, local residents are understandably becomming concerned. Ms Eva Evansham, president of the parish committee described the reports as "outragous scaremongering."

"Obviously," she told our reporter, "the old diddys left their handbags on the bus, and are expecting the council to pay up."

However, not all are willing to dismiss the reports of aliens so easily. "It's all a government conspiracy," said one source, who could not be named. "I read it on the Internet. They're using the aliens as a smokescreen to carry out evil experiments on the unexpecting public."